Some might tell you you're crazy. Some say insane. I say normal. Normal in the scene that you haven't just lived through what I did. No I didn't have a epic battle with Jeff and live or been driven out the door of my dorm by BEN, no, I have been through far worse.
Words can't begin to describe it. Not once have I seen something so grotesque. I sat through an episode of Gen 3 MLP. Nah just yanking your chain (ha ha so funny). No, but still I have to admit my experience is horrifying. It does not scare me to this day but it's presence still lingers in the back of my brain in the cluttered mess that it is in. My story begins with a notice on my game.
It's the same old "warning if you have a history of epilepsy blah-diddy blah-diddy blah" but what got me was the font it was in. I was playing Ratchet and Clank Crack in Time and I knew that the font was regular compared to this. It was the same font in which the God of War titles have their text as. Puzzled, I looked down at my PS3. It was running all the same.
Then the screen froze on this screen. Annoyed, I turned the console off and went to my Dell laptop. I ran through my videos for something decent, to no avail, and went back to my game area. I tried my GameCube, this time on the game Kirby's Air Ride. The font was as it should be this time and I played around on city free run. Bored, I turned on my PS3 again to get another look at R&CCiT.
The screen didn't freeze this time but the text was still different. The title screen was sketchy, to say the least. It was very bland, for it was a gray background with the black boxes reading "newgame", "continue", "options", and "online". I chose continue to be greeted with a windows error sound and a message reading "No save data reachable". The word "reachable" puzzled me to no end. Did it mean it was there but could not get to it? Who cares, oh well, click new game I guess.
I started instantaneously in a field playing as Ratchet. The field was filled with open space and had no logic behind it. Jumps changed viscosity rapidly, speed change spazmaticly, and even the graphics could barely hold up. After about a minute of derping I came across something. Terrific. It was an enemy in the death animation being looped. Wait. I saw something. Is it? Can it be? No of course not. Isn't it. It was spewing red all over the green ground and plagued the once blue sky backdrop. The background changed back to blue after a short period but it was still unsettling, but then again the fact a game wasn't working was unsettling as well. I turned the game off after running into an invisible wall shortly after.
The next day I examined the disc that I was playing the night before. It seemed alright, but why was it glitching? It worked fine for nearly two whole years and never did I see anything close to this magnitude. I decided to try a different game. I started playing Plants VS Zombies. It worked fine. I guessed it was only R&C. Later that day I tried R&C again.
Something strange was there were no option besides "continue" and "options" this time. I went to options first to look at them for fear of the game itself. I was greeted with a picture of Jeff's face with the text "Nice try, pon" over it. This made me jump a bit, but I pressed triangle and Jeff left my screen. I relaxed and began to play the game. I found myself in a open area again but in water. This time movement was less spazmatic but I still found controlling the lombax difficult. I came to land after a bit of free swim and got out of my watery wonderland.
On this island, I dubbed Let's Glitch on pon2354. I found another thing. WOW! This one was of Captian Quwark and I found it somewhat amusing. He was lying on the ground with bloody stumps for arms and legs. His head was in bits and pieces around this small island and there was a small hole in his lower torso.
Then the amusement stopped as over and over my TV bursted out loud mixed and possible distorted voice clips for Captain Quwarks dialog. I quickly muted my TV but the sound still rung in my ears. The PS3 powered off and my sister banged on the door yelling at me to keep it down. I didn't look at my PS3 for the rest of that week.
I had a dream on the night after my last play. This has nothing to do with the game itself the one the night before had lots more to do with that, but no one wants to hear about that. I awoke in a small warm cell, a tray of food lay before me. I ate but the food did not fill my stomach. I ne- did you really think I was going to do that? I was on the island again (this is the night before). Next to me was the corpse of a man in green spandex. I looked around but only an open ocean met my gaze. I started to walk towards the water only to be stopped by a glass dome. It was then that I awoke.
I went to school Monday. It was my birthday so I tried to make the best of what was going on that day. There was a test so I was confident, there was an erring to run so I ran to do it, there was an annoying kid I told him to shut the fuck up. It was when I returned that I finally got my chance. It would be a few hours before my mom got home so I decided to play R&C again. I was welcomed warmly with a picture of BEN followed by text saying:
"Play me."
I obliged by pressing continue, ignoring the options option. I was in the field again but the movement was at a much more even pace.
I had Ratchet skip merrily along. I was trolling the game ignoring the gore I had pass, mostly just characters' dead bodies, until I was done having my fun. I felt like one more act of rebellion was needed so to really give it a kick I hit the pause button and got up to take a piss. I laughed all the way to my bathroom and released the byproduct, flushing and coming back still chuckling. I was welcomed with a pause screen mad up of gory gory bloody gore. How nice I thought as I unpaused the game. I was about to have my laugh when Ratchet said, "Oh please, you think you avoid me?" At which point a sudden chill overcame me. A series of mind boggling images flashed through my head. When I awoke several hours later, my PS3 was off. I like to keep it that way now.
It's been fun going through the deepest bowels of my memory to scrounge up this much info. Hope you liked my little fun ride.
''Written by Pon2354''